Vampires for Africa (part 3)

Dum, dum, dum, dum DOOOOOONE!

I did it - I read the book I swore up and down that I would never, ever touch. Before making such a declaration though, I should have remembered the famous words of a French pigeon named Henri, "Never say never." (An American Tail anyone?) 

Anyways. 

For the sake of the orphans (I know, I'm such a pathetic attempt at a martyr), I read Twilight and earned some financial support for my trip to Uganda from my conniving best friend (a true Twilighter if I ever knew one... which I do. Quite a few actually. I'm even related to some of them. By blood. har. har. har.)

Anyways. (again)

The big (or small, depending on your vested interest in the book) question is: Have I been converted? Have I experienced "the change"? Have I undergone the "transformation" into a Twilight fan? 

Not hardly. But I have searched deep within my sardonic opinions of the series (and the ensuing pop-culture obsession that it caused) and put together a short list of things that even I can begrudgingly appreciate about the book.

1). The cover art for the Twilight series is brilliant - absolutely beautiful visually and the artwork depicts the theme of each book in an interesting, metaphorical way. As a designer, I can't help but to admire that. 

2). My heart did flutter once and only once - during Meyer's very accurate description of the usually beauty of the Arizona desert - a beauty that, having lived here most of my life, I love and appreciate in the same way Bella does... did. Before she became consumed with Edward and nothing but. 

3). The book is PG-rated. There are no vulgar or over-sexualized scenes (which are irritatingly common in secular literature and are becoming increasing more common in teen literature - i.e. Gossip Girls). The few violent scenes that did appear are not described in an overly-graphic way either (but I don't know about the follow-up books.)

4). The book's spin on the classic vampire is interesting. The historical account of Meyer's brand of blood-suckers (or non-blood-suckers in this case) was the only part of the story that I was intrigued to know more about. Unfortunately, there existed amidst this engaging tale of vampires one regrettable element that rendered my dislike for the book unwavering:

Bella. 

I must honestly (and reluctantly) admit that had Bella not been in this story, or rather, had she been depicted in a different, less obsessive way, I would have quite enjoyed the book. However. How-e-ver, Bella's desperate, unhealthy, all-encompassing addiction to Edward ruined an otherwise potentially pleasant read. That, and I didn't personally care for Edward's arrogant, controlling personality but I already mentioned that here. 

One last little tidbit of fun before I move on with my non-vampire-obsessed life: This video, How Twilight Should Have Ended by HISHE. 

Oh. So. Funny. (And I couldn't agree more - because really, how long can you drag out an inevitability? For four long books apparently.)

Thanks Megan for your support - I truly appreciate it despite the package it arrived in. Now if I could just find about two-thousand more dollars worth of diabolically creative fund-raising ideas...